Me, Myself and I

ngeh..it’s been a while..been bz..been stressed..been crazyy….been mcm2 lah lg…rase cam takley nak digambarkan dgn kate2…cewah..haha..adakah sy happy??..well..still have no definite answer..adakah itu bermaksud sy tidak happy?? pun tak pasti jugak..yg pastinya guwe bersyukur..

new workplace..new environment..new frens….quite tough at first..*sigh*..tp lame2 cam okla jugak…nak cite pun byk sgt..tp sume cite da cite kat ecah..hahaha..tiap2 ari dia dgr aku bercerita..sian dia..abestu..nak bgtau sapelah lg kan..dia jek rajen layan aku ym dikala aku bz..dia pun bz tp smpt maen pet society..hahaha..dimanakah keadilan???..kekeke..aku ley ym jekla nmpknye ..td masa meeting pun bos da ckp..tiap2 minggu IT akan hantar dia log website2 yg ktorang access..camno tu..hahahaha..aku senyum kamben jela td smbl wat muke yg ala2 “sapela punye keje tu”..aahahah..padahal aku pun same..giler keh nak wat keje straight..ish ish..produktif sungguhla pasni..

as usual…ade jek org yg kureng puas ati ngan aku..tapahamla nape..tu belum jumpe lg tu..br sembang sumbang di alam maya sbb dia branch laen..nak jek aku tanye dia ape mslh dia..tp..cam biasela..aku ckp dlm ati jek..haha…kantoi dia dok tanye kat sorang mamat ni..kebetulan lak aku kene share notebook ngan mamat tu disbbkan notebook aku tu bisu..so tenampakla..aku join training same pun nak kecoh….bknnye aku saje nak join..dah org suruh..giler keppa…tak puas hati maila kite lawan..haha..kelam kabut tuan punye notebook tu..takut aku kecik ati..aku buat2 tanampak..tp..sedey..hahaha..tuan punye notebook tu mmg baik..dia more to technical…tp setakat ni..ape yg aku tanye sume dia akan cube jwb dgn jayanye….ade 1 kali tu aku penin psl table nye design..aku cite2 kat dia..dia pun jd penin..last2 dia ckp esok dia ajar cara normalization..hahaha ..aku da blaja mende tu time study dulu..tp bile nak apply..ampeh…tara guna punya org…..tp bos aku da warning jgn amek masa dia sgt…aku ckp kat bos aku..aku amek 5-10 mins je per day(yo la tu..hahaha)..bos aku takde seminggu..akan ku gunekan masa ini sebaek2nya menimba ilmu dr dia..muahahhaahah..caiyok caiyok!!!

oklah..nak ready2…mau tgk itu diari af7..
sy suke yazid..akim..aril(mcm muke mr apple guwe) dan hafiz!!
harap2 derang tak kuar awal..
suke plak dgr lagu “how do u sleep”..betulkah dia telah merampas gf milo ventigmilia? takpelah..biar aku jek jd gf milo …lagipun aku suke menum milo ais..bau2 bacang la tu..huhuhu

hahaha..takde kene mengena ngan tajuk pun..saje jek ngade2 nak type arini..ngeh ngeh..smlm telah mendpt satu call dari tmpt itu..sy diterima..sy hepi tp…sy confuse..betulkah apa yg sy buat ni..patutkah? bolehkah? mampukah? eheheh…soalan2 itu yg telah menghantui sy..

maka..hari isnin ni adalah hari penentu..oh ya..sy tidak mengkabarkan berita ini lg kpd family sy…takut mereka berharap lebey2..kalau tak jadi?? mereka akan kecewa..itu sj..sbb sbnrnya sy pun tidak pasti..semoga sy tidak menemui jalan buntu… huhuhu…

last but not least…sy mahu mengucapkan selamat pengantin baru walaupun dah agak lama..heheh.. buat Ecah dan Botak kerana telah selamat diijabkabulkan pada 12/12/2008 ..Semoga anda berdua bahagia hingga ke anak cucu cicit dan cucut….huhu

hari ini sy sepatutnya pergi ke kenduri Za dan Adi tp di atas sbb2 yg tak dpt dielakkan sy tidak dpt pergi..maka Selamat Pengantin Baru jugak buat anda berdua..
Sy mahu balik..daaaaa

Aku Memang Terlanjur Mencintaimu
Dan Tak Pernah Ku Sesali Itu
Seluruh Jiwa Telah Ku Serahkan
Menggenggam Janji Setiaku

Kumohon Jangan Jadikan Semua Ini
Alasan Kau Menyakitiku
Meskipun Cintamu Tak Hanya Untukku
Tapi Cobalah Sejenak Mengerti

Bila Rasaku Ini Rasamu
Sanggupkah Engkau Menahan Sakitnya
Terkhianati Cinta Yang Kau Jaga

Coba Bayangkan Kembali
Betapa Hancurnya Hati Ini Kasih
Semua Telah Terjadi

Aku Memang Terlanjur Mencintaimu

*Sigh*

Symmetry by Mew

I’m caught in the symmetry of your mind
But I’m not happier than you
I’m caught in the symmetry of your mind
But I’m not happier than you

Did I really see you or was it just a dream
Dreaming that it was seamless
Not a trace of wrong words
That we have spoken
Little did we know
No bigotry no tears shed

Ohh if only
You’d try to be polite
Thinking you were right
Only to find that you’re unkind
But ironically you will always be
Belle of The Ball …at least to me

I’m caught in the symmetry of your mind
But I’m not happier than you

But my words are frail not audible
They do not even convince me
Perhaps they are untrue
I gave you all the benefits of all the doubts I had

Never hoped to be as benign as me
Funny how you always get through
But ironically you will always be
Belle of The Ball …at least to me

7 years back..

Jat ni..bley plak dia simpan lagi surat kakak-adek ni..hahah..malu nye bile bace blk..sah2 cam bdk2..huhu

aku tataulah ape yg derang fikir..or ape yg derang ingat aku fikir..seriously..boleh tak kalau aku biarkan dulu..everything happens for a reason..maybe ini yg da ditentukan utk aku..it still hurts but aku terima..
learn to live with it..afterall..tak mati pun..dgn izin tuhan chiow

tgk gilak dgr lagu neh

What’s wrong with me?
Why do I feel like this?
I’m going crazy now

No more gas in the rear
Can’t even get it started
Nothing heard, nothing said
Can’t even speak about it
Out my life out my head
Don’t want to think about it
Feels like I’m going insane
Yeah

It’s a thief in the night
To come and grab you
It can creep up inside you
And consume you
A disease of the mind
It can control you
It’s too close for comfort

Put on your brake lights
We’re in the city of wonder
Ain’t gonna play nice
Watch out, you might just go under
Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must falter be wise
Your mind is in disturbia
It’s like the darkness is the light
Disturbia
Am I scaring you tonight
Your mind is in disturbia
Ain’t used to what you like
Disturbia
Disturbia

Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum

Faded pictures on the wall
It’s like they talkin’ to me
Disconnectin’ phone calls
The phone don’t even ring
I gotta get out
Or figure this shit out
It’s too close for comfort

It’s a thief in the night
To come and grab you
It can creep up inside you
And consume you
A disease of the mind
It can control you
I feel like a monster

Put on your brake lights
We’re in the city of wonder
Ain’t gonna play nice
Watch out, you might just go under
Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must falter be wise
Your mind is in disturbia
It’s like the darkness is the light
Disturbia
Am I scaring you tonight
Your mind is in disturbia
Ain’t used to what you like
Disturbia
Disturbia

Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum
Bum bum be-dum bum bum be-dum bum

Release me from this curse I’m in
Trying to maintain
But I’m struggling
If you can go, go, go
I think I’m going to oh, oh, oh

Put on your brake lights
We’re in the city of wonder
Ain’t gonna play nice
Watch out, you might just go under
Better think twice
Your train of thought will be altered
So if you must faulter be wise
Your mind is in disturbia
It’s like the darkness is the light
Disturbia
Am I scaring you tonight
Your mind is in disturbia
Ain’t used to what you like
Disturbia
Disturbia